weddings are hard work

I hadn't been to one since I was around 10, and I was a little curious to see what goes down from the inside. The answer: pictures. Lots and lots of pictures. Before, during, and after the ceremony. And I was only a groomsman, so I wasn't in a quarter of them. But I got exhausted by just looking at the B&G having to put on a million separate smiles for 8+ hours.

My strategy in keeping the groom calm was to act as if the day was just like any other day - you know, none of the "How are you feeling?" stuff and more of the randomly singing Queen's "Radio Ga Ga." It seemed to work as his only external signs of stress I noticed were some pacing, some "craps" and one "holy crap." Although, I did spend the 30 minutes immediately preceding the ceremony ushering in guests, so he could have been having seizures then for all I know.

The ceremony went off without a hitch (save for the hitch, ahyuck), and was beautifully done. Standing up there for so long in my hard plastic shoes (insert eye-rolling from every bridesmaid ever) did force me to switch to sneakers for the reception - that and the fact that I'm totally down with the sneakers-with-formal-wear look in general.

Good-Natured Disappointments:

• My height advantage made me the early favorite for the garter, by I got totally beat to it by a nimble and cat-like Best Man.
  
• "Thriller" was not played during the reception.
• I was sick the whole day and got worse toward the end of the reception, which I mostly spent coughing into a napkin and nursing a beer.
  
• No one got rowdy, so I was unable to take advantage of a groomsman's role as a de facto bouncer.
• There were no Greek or Jewish relatives, so sadly no plates were smashed. The punch bowl did get knocked over, however, so that was awesome.