hey, you see this?

WE ****ING OWN IT, BITCHES.

Wake 92, UNC 89

Wake 70, Duke 68.

125 pages

That's what I've just read for ONE class. It's 110 minutes long, so we'll be covering more than a page per minute.

Somebody kill me. Or hug me. Either works, really.

UPDATE: Next week's class? 174 pages! I LOVE LAW SCHOOL.

Wake Forest Stands Alone

You'd think I'd like to go on and on about how we're the last undefeated team in the nation and how if we're not rated #1 in both polls tomorrow morning I will set multiple buildings on fire, but the truth is I'm such a nervous wreck about all this success I'd rather just twiddle my thumbs and give you some more highly important thoughts.

All these commercials with some Lincoln impersonator got me thinking: how long after a famous and admired political figure is assassinated does it become acceptable to make parodies of him? 100 years? When no one is still alive that can remember the assassination? I mean, when do I get to see commercials featuring comedic Kennedy brothers and MLKs? Is 2050 the over/under?

I've only attended two classes of Employment Discrimination, and I'm already tired of typing out "discriminate" and all its variants. I'm thinking about using the word "diss" instead. This way, I can just type "disser," "dissation," "dissatory," etc.

I miss the Sprint Trench Coat Guy. And now so do you.

Last year, we had an AFC Championship game featuring a New England team that won all 16 regular season games. This year, the NFC Championship features two teams that won a combined 18 regular season games.

This might be the greatest Garfield Minus Garfield yet.

I really, really want Arizona to win this game, and it's only because I am so sick of watching Eagle games. Well, that and I'm still floored that McNabb didn't know a fundamental overtime rule of the game he's paid millions to play.

thoughts, the day after

No, seriously, IN YOUR FACE AMERICA.

I think an important part of doing good deeds is to not brag about them afterward. But this deed is so stuffed, sauteed and topped with goodness that I can't help myself. I was looking through the mail and came across a letter addressed to someone else, and noticed it had something more than just papers inside. Turns out to be Phillies tickets for the 2009 season. A lot of them. $314 worth. Some of them were even for the interleague series against Boston. There was a good 30 seconds there when I thought of the possibilities: selling them, making a return trip to Philly to attend the games... But then I put on my coat and brought them to the front office, who said the guy was a current resident and they would give them to him. I left knowing if an aneurysm hit me right then and there, I had a pretty sweet talking point cued* up for the Heaven Entry Committee.

As it turns out, "1-12" is the date of the first class, not the first assignment. Reading comprehension fail.

I really like Boston's off season signings. Penny, Baldelli, Smoltz, and Saito are all low-risk, high-reward acquisitions. Plus, they come shame-free, unlike the Yankee's moves of spending the GDP of Samoa on three players.

I'm sure a dozen comedians have already covered this, but why don't they just make walkers that already come with tennis balls?

The 24 season premiere and Wake/Carolina happening at the same time was less than ideal, but having just watched last night's episodes, it seemed like an excellent start to the season. Last time around, I could never shake the feeling I'd seen all of this before, like I was watching vaguely recalled reruns. This year, we have enough new elements (DC instead of LA, FBI instead of CTU) that 24's got that fresh feeling back.

Speaking of 24, that Taken movie with Liam Neeson, while looking pretty sweet, is basically a remake of 24's first season. Just thought you'd like to know.

*It is "cued," right, that means "to have ready," instead of "queued?"

IN YOUR FACE AMERICA

I OBJECT

You have to list twelve (12!) character references to apply for the NC bar. What's worse, these people must...

• have known me well for a number of years
• not a law student
• not applying to take the NC bar exam
  
• not a relative, by blood or marriage
• not a current or a former supervisor
• no two people can live live at the same address
  

Coming up with this list in high school or college would have been easy, but now? NOW? I don't have 12 people that qualify for this! Even if I had made tons of friends at Widener, I'd STILL be in trouble, because my references can't be law students! It's not even possible to be a third-year law student and still be in contact with 12 friends who don't go to law school and who've known you well for a number of years (and none of them can live together)!

AHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Update: I was able to get all the needed references. They include:

• 12 friends as good moral character ref's, 4 having to fill out a form, and 4 of which I haven't talked to in years.
  
• 3 lawyers I've worked for
• 2 law professors
  
• Both parents and all 3 of my first cousins as "locality" ref's.

That's twenty-two references you need in order to take the NC bar exam. Cheese. And. Rice.

By the way Phantom, I just checked Missouri's bar app rules. They don't even start accepting them until February 1st, three weeks after mine are freaking due*.

* or else incur the wrath of a $250 late fee, as you were kind enough to alert me about.

for you "two-thousand" people

This the last year I will accept people saying the current year in the "two-thousand" style. Extending number pronunciation to "two-thousand AND ____" (as we are oft to do, present company included) only makes this problem worse. Come 363 days from now, we all need to adopt the "twenty" style, as in 2010 is pronounced "twenty ten," just like the good ole days of the late 20th century. Did anyone ever party like it was "nineteen hundred ninety nine?" NO. They partied like it was "nineteen ninety nine," and all was right with the universe.

When 2010 comes, and I overhear anyone saying "two-thousand and ten," I will punch them in the face, grab them by their collar and scream "WHY YOU FOOL? WHY?"

P.S. We totally missed a great opportunity to pronounce the year 2007 as "two double-oh seven." Which would have been awesome. WHAT PRICE TWO-THOUSANDERS???